


A True Story

by freddyfazbears420factory



Category: Barney & Friends, Dora the Explorer (Cartoon)
Genre: Gen, Jurassic Junk, The further adventures of Larry the Cucumber and his monster green peen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-06
Updated: 2014-12-06
Packaged: 2018-02-28 10:25:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2728913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freddyfazbears420factory/pseuds/freddyfazbears420factory
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Barney is confronted with someone from his past......someone......who should be dead....</p>
            </blockquote>





	A True Story

At Barney's house, or wherever the fuck the show takes place, several kids were sitting around doing nothing. "I wonder what Barney will teach us today?" a small boy asked aloud.

Barney burst through the brick wall of the house, shades over his eyes and ten blunts in his mouth. He shouted in his roaring dinosaur voice, "WE GON' LEARN SHAPES, BITCHES!"

One girl fainted. "What is that??" the boy asked, pointing at Barney's bling. "DAT'S BARNEY'S BLANG, FOOL!" Barney shouted, as he smacked the youth. From the giant dinosaur shaped hole in the wall came five other kids. There were three boys dressed in a manner similar to Barney and two girls dressed like hookers. "MA BOTTOM BITCHES" Barney screeched, smacking the two girls with his monstrous cock.  "U GONNA LEARN WHAT THE SHAPE A' DIS DICK LOOK LIKE TODAY HOS" Barney exclaimed, as he continued battering the prostitutes with his dino-dick. He then grabbed one of the girls and skewered her on his dinohood, much to the horror of the children. "BARNEY NO!!" someone yelled.

"BARNEY YES." Barney shrieked as his cock went through the girl and he stuck the tip in the second girl. Barney cackled maniacally while the other children watched with horror. Suddenly, one of the boys in Barney's gang screeched, "CRACK HO AHOY!!!!" The children and Barney all turned to see a fat Mexican hooker with a blunt rolled up in her backpack pocket enter the room.

"We meet again, Barney..." Dora hissed.

"YOU OWE ME MY METH" Dora bitched loudly. She ripped off her clothes to reveal a hooker outfit made of monkey skin and whipped a gun from her backpack. The children screamed and ran for cover. But Barney simply laughed as the other two dinosaurs joined him. The two dinosaurs grabbed the hispanic wonder-whore and threw her up against the wall. Barney stood over her and shot her in the knee with his piece. "I'll FUCK U UP WHOR-A, JUST U WATCH ME." Dora screamed in anger. "Fuck you!!"

"WHAT? I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE GLOCK IN YOUR MOUTH!" Barney said as he jammed the gun in her mouth. The other dinos laughed at the obvious dick joke. Dora kicked Barney's jurassic junk and hauled ass out the door to regroup with her gang. Even little Tico was wearing his vest and shades. Barney shot at her as she ran. Luckily for Dora, her monkey suit hooker getup saved her. She grabbed her gun and shot at Barney, but instead blew a hole in the wall.

Suddenly, Dora found herself impaled on a large green object.

"What the fuck?" Barney shouted.

"Reach for the sky."

Dora's corpse fell from the green pole to reveal Larry the Cucumber.


End file.
